Behavioral modification is a deceptively simple approach for regulating your autistic child's behavior by setting expectations that are backed up by rewards/negative consequences. This approach is described in Managing Problem Behaviors. However, this concise description of the approach does not do justice to its magic: teaching your child about respect and making good choices.
Many caregivers do not expect their autistic children, particularly those with limited language skills, to acquire an understanding of such abstract concepts. Moreover, behavioral modification has been criticized for the rigidity of its approach, as highlighted in Applied Behavioral Analysis. In Behavior Modification Techniques, this approach is considered to be overly reliant on external rewards. Thus, behavioral modification is perceived to be a tool that can wrought profound, internal changes in autistic children.
Ironically, it is precisely this systematic and repetitive administration of rewards/negative consequences that enables autistic children to understand these important lessons of life.
Behavioral modification has been meticulously designed to teach autistic children to respect firm and fair people, and make the right choices.
Respect: Compliance with Expectations
To view behavioral modification from a novel perspective, you can see it as a game. According to the rules of engagement, you set up your expectation that your child is supposed to obey. When your child complies, you give him/her a reward; conversely, when your child does not comply, you mete out a negative consequence.
Every time you respond in accordance with these rules, you are exhibiting fairness and strength, both of which help your child to respect you. First, your autistic child perceives you as a fair person whom he/she can trust: your words match your action. This is why your consistent administration of rewards and consequences, playing by the rules of the game, is so important in establishing you as a figure that is worthy of respect.
Second, by adopting a firm stance in enforcing your expectations, even in the face of your child's tantrums, you prove yourself to be a worthy adversary. By prevailing in this battle of wills, you are actually conveying a powerful message:
- You respect your child enough to believe that he/she can meet your expectations.
- You will do whatever it takes to help him/her to do better.
Over time, the fact that you love your child so much to engage in these "battles" will leave an indelible impression on his/her being. Both of you will move on to build an enduring and incredible relationship that is founded on mutual respect and love.
Making Good Choices
Behavioral modification teaches autistic children that all choices in life are accompanied by specific consequences in stark terms. Furthermore, having to take responsibility for their choices helps them to reflect carefully on their decisions.
With this approach, your child is presented with two choices: good (compliance) versus bad (non-compliance). While you cannot force your child to make the right choice, your consistent administration of the reward and consequence will help to guide your child's decision-making process. The entire process that involves weighing options, considering the consequences and bearing responsibility for his/her choices is critical in helping your child to reflect carefully on the "path" to take.
Though your consistent implementation of behavioral modification, with effective rewards/negative consequences, you will be amazed at how such a simple approach can teach your autistic child about respect and making good choices.
Kah Ying Choo - Formerly an academic researcher in the U.S. for eight years, I am a writer/educator and a homeschooler of Sebastien, my 12-year-old ...
